Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Some Cool Definitions:

Some Cool Definitions:
1. Cigarette:A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool at the other.
2. Love affairs:Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five day test.
3. Marriage:It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master
4. Divorce:Future tense of marriage
5. Lecture:An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either".
6. Conference:The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
7. Compromise:The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.
8. Tears:The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water-power ..
9. Dictionary:A place where divorce comes before marriage.
10. Conference Room:A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.
11. Ecstasy:A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.
12. Classic:A book which people praise, but do not read.
13. Smile:A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
14. Office:A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
15. Yawn:The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
16. Etc.:A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
17. Committee:Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
18. Experience:The name men give to their mistakes.
19. Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.
20. Philosopher:A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.
21. Diplomat: A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.
22. Opportunist:A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.
23. Optimist:A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says in midway "See I am not injured yet."
24. Pessimist:A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY.
25. Miser:A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.
26. Father:A banker provided by nature.
27. Criminal:A guy no different from the rest... except that he got caught.
28. Boss:Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
29. Politician:One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.
30. Doctor:A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.
31. Computer Engineer:One who gets paid for reading such mails......

Career Song - The 7 stages
1. when in college : Hum honge kaamiyaab, Hum honge kaam iyaab ek din.....
2. when giving interview to Multi National Company: Tu hi re.. Too hi re ....tere binaaa main kaise jiyunn....
3. waiting for interview result: Intehaa ho gai Intzaarki.. aayinaaa kuch khabar mere yaarki ..


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